Escape

my oh oh tee dee 

I don't know what to post anymore, I don't open my laptop that much since this april and apparently I bought a PLL (pretty little liars) dvd box set which I am super addicted now, I was hoping to get the inspiration I've been wanting to see and understand but lately I'm starting feel sad and I feel vulnerable myself. I don't like that, I don't like those feelings I get like I wanted to disappear and be gone like zeroed out from this world, I don't like that feeling where you don't know who to trust anymore, I don't like that feeling where you think everyone secretly hates you, I hate that feeling where you feel like you need to care what other people thinks of you, I don't like that feeling where you can't even write one word on what you feel. Its like the universe itself can't explain what you are feeling that it actually gives up on you like you do to yourself.

I hated saying this or more like writing this stuffs about how I feel, but writing is the only thing that gives me hope and relived feelings from all of this. But thats not the point of this post its just half of it.

Education shouldn't be about teaching us formulas or process that we'll never think about when we leave school, it should never be about solving problems in a complicated fractions, how about give us a lesson about how to have a strong healthy self image, teach us how to deal with mortgages and bills. How to find a value in everyone and everything, teach us how it's okay to be different from each other, teach us how to find ourselves, teach us that choosing your sex is not a crime, teach us how to not judge other people by their appearance, teach us how to chase our dreams, instead of drilling the idea into our minds that our grades determine our future. Education shouldn't be like going to a break hell where every morning you need to wake up and worry about the same thing everyday, people who dislikes you, teachers who make you do hard stuff that doesn't even make sense anymore, teachers who  force you to speak up in front of your class instead of doing it themselves, paying up some bills just for a school dance, making you suffer from all this homework, School doesn't make sense anymore, I get the fact that you're there to learn or for what people say to make friends and have a social life but you can have both without going to school.

Teach the next generation to love the world they're living in instead of teaching them the things that people now are teaching us, teach them how it's okay if they don't like the same thing as everyone, that it's okay to be who you are instead of pretending to be someone else, so they can fix the mistake that we inherited to you.

I was always the kind of girl who go to school and pretend to love it, I'm tired of going to school and learn the same thing everyday, solving problems and equation, learning story's and such as. I want to travel around the world and see new perspective everyday, talk to people and learn that way. I wanted to do things in my own way, make mistake and redo it. I want to learn as I go gathering knowledge and not rigorously tested on it. I want to learn things as I find myself along the journey, I don't want to lose passion in the things i love because of the worry of exams. If only I have all the money I need to get out of this place and start finding a whole new world, I would, I would go and get away from this old place where I've been practically hurt, I would go and forget all those people who don't believe in me, I can get away from the people who hurt me, I can have my own place in New York or Paris, meet new people, find a job and just escape from school and other old habits that I have. School was never my best friend but i met some good people, but that's not the point, I want to travel and learn from here and there, I don't need school to learn things in a hard way. When I was writing, i know that a lot of you would react or think "you're lucky you can go to school while someone out there doesn't have the money to go to school" well SORRY that I see things in a right and good way. Life isn't about going to school and associate with teachers and friends, its about learning but does school made you any good? yeah you have friends there, but the lesson you gather from it was not the helpful and genius topics that you can take with you as you struggle to live. Because while it's important for us to learn the facts and figures, I'm pretty certain that if you'd taught us all of the above, the world be such a lovelier place. Like it always should be.

-Jackie