book recommendation video

Eye of the tiger

I rarely don't do this but I did anyway right? And it's been awhile since I wrote a blog so here I am sitting here, don't know what to write maybe because theres nothing to write at all. I'm still depress about the two events that I let passed this month first the 'Wanderland' and 'The Circuit Fest' but I promise myself that I won't let it happen again maybe the next wanderland event I'll be there with some of my close friends and just enjoy the indie bands that I will surely love since I have a taste of a little bit of jamming session on some 2 Door Cinema Club.

But thats really not the point of this blog, lately I've been receiving hate and rude comments on my ask.fm account and I don't actually mind them but last week it really gets out of hand and it really does hurt me that some people actually think of me as a bad person which I highly think is not really true, I did my very best to be the person that I've always wanted to be and thats a girl who see good things in everything specially on people but lately some people proven me that not everyone can see good things in life and I pity those people, you can't fix yourself breaking someone else, you can only do good things for yourself which is to work hard achieving your goals in life not wasting time sending hate comments on someone behind those computer screen.

I think its pathetic how some people can actually do stuff or say stuff like that on someone, you don't know what they're going through yet you still send hate comments, thats nice of you. I already get through this kind of stuffs and I won't let it happen again, not this time that I know it'll break me. Those people who still send hate because of their shallow reasons and pathetic excuses, I hope you know how much words can hurt other people but I guess you'll never learn until it happens to you. But theres always a hope if you think you're not your best then work hard on being the best instead of lurking and sulking behind those screens and doing useless stuffs that you don't noticed can put someone else life in danger. Stop hating and start loving. There are a lot of good things that life has to offer to you and to everyone else who loses hope on getting better. You can always change, for better or worst in the end good things will come to you, you just need to learn in the hard way.

I know I'm not the very best person, I'm sarcastic all the time, I have my mood swings, I can be a bitch sometimes but thats only a little part of me that you know, so you can't actually judged me because of this, i know if you knew me personally maybe I can accept the fact that you hate me but you're a complete anon, and thats what hurt the most. 

I don't quite believe on explaining myself to an anon who clearly doesn't listen to me, but I do find my way out of trouble, recently I deactivated my ask.fm account (this morning) and you know what i feel when I did? it feels great i don't know why but I know one thing for sure, I'm tired of explaining things to a strangers who don't have better things to do with their life than just sulking and hating, it is pretty obvious that I am pissed off but a nice person I am, I ignored some anon too and it really feels nice to have some of my close friends to talk to when in times like this. It just shows how love and hate can divide one person into a whole person (i hope you guys gets my drift there) 

I have better things to do than just to sit around and visit all these social networking sites so, yes I may deactivate my twitter and Facebook and some account that I have, I'll give myself some break to all this riot that are going on in every sites, but hopefully it will all get better soon.

People will send you hate and awful stuffs, calls you name and such but don't let it affect you. I don't take rude comments seriously because If I let it get to me then it won't go away and I'll just torture myself thinking about it which sometimes I do but I DON'T, because no matter what we do 'internet is still internet'. The Internet is a really big part of my life, I met so many people around the world who I've cherish and love as a friend, but sometimes you gotta do your own thing and start living. Real world awaits you, yes internet is all you can asked for but the thing is, it will not always be there for you It's magical and everything is digital but sometimes you gotta distance yourself. If someone is mean to you over the internet or send you hate and rude comments just ignore it and blocked the anon, don't waste your time on those kind people because once you do, you will only let a day passed by while you can live your life peacefully.

I know you guys sometimes misinterpret my sarcastic comments and such and I'm sorry for that, I have my mistakes but that doesn't mean you can take someone on pedestal and send hateful things on them. In a matter of times in the future you'll learn how things work over the internet and me, in such a young age have known what its like to be on the centre of someones life as a threat and I am also sorry for behalf of it. I always thought that maybe being anti-social is good but it's really not and I hope you guys understand that the fact that internet can damage you is a pretty obvious and serious problem.

I advice to all my readers who are experiencing cyberbullying, just blocked the anon or person and just ignored it like don't even think about it instead go out and have fun, live your life and start socialising with people, life is too short to waste it on people who clearly don't have anything to do. Always have fun and see good things in everything I promise it will all work out in the end, it always will. So long this turns out to be a rant and I'm sorry about that, I'll take a break from the internet for while. Bye guys i love you all xx

Get too close

This is my first fashion blog which I promise to post as soon as I have a SLR and here I am ashamed to see your guys reaction to this which I think is kinda good? idk I'm sorry for my lack of post lately, I just had a lot of things that are going on with my normal boring life. 

We've taken a lot of photos and I only chosen 10, probably because I'm too awkward to all of it plus I don't even know how to post I just stand there and probably making a fool out of me but anyway I did post this fashion blog right? 

I've learned a few things this month that I wanted to share with you guys. First I learn that no matter how much effort you put on something maybe, just maybe it's really not meant to be the way you want it to be and sometimes things can only be achieve if you work hard on it. Second, think twice before you judged other people you don't know what they're going through. 

I'm sorry about my pose and face here, I just don't know how to post and as I said again and again I'll improve more and I really enjoyed doing this kind of thing.

I will try on doing this more, this is not really my thing but after this photo-shoot I quite frankly enjoyed it, the laugh and awkwardness makes this more perfect for me.

The upper photo is actually a stolen shot but i love it because it actually describe this post, - laughable and happiness throughout the whole pictures I found myself grinning more and more then back to my business face

That is all for today I hope you enjoy my quite messy outfit, I got my utility jacket in a thrift shop on Baguio and of course my infamous Doc Martens :) good day y'all

Happy Mother's Day!

Happy Mother's day to the most beautiful and coolest mom on the planet, my mother :)

It's been 15 years since you gave birth to me, and I still can't thank you enough for all the things you have given and shared with me, you were always there when I need someone, when I can't stand up for myself, you out stand every mother on this earth for being the most caring mother. You're the person who I know will always accept me through all the mistakes that I've made in my life.

Thank you for being my strength when I'm weak, thank you for understanding me as I struggle through my teenage years, even though everyone has turn their backs on me you're still there stood firmly on the ground with arms wide open, I can't even thank you enough for all the things that you have done for me and for our family, you are the kind of person that I wanted to be, maybe someday

Thank you for being the best mom that jersey and I could asked for, thank you for supporting me throughout my decision whether its bad or good, but I learned my lesson and I did shared that with you. I know how much efforts you put on just to give us the life that you told us you never had, you have always been my one and only hero. You thought me to never rely on anyone because in the end the only person you can count on is yourself  and you proved that to me, you're a strong woman and I bet anyone who heard/knows your story will be amaze too on how much you work hard just to be where you are, thats what makes you a total supermom for me :) 

Everyone who knows or closes to you admires you, I know that for sure, because regardless what everyones say to you, you can still smile. I can't even thank lord enough because he had given me a perfect and strong mother like you, seeing you smile is one of the amazing thing that I could've ask. I've seen you overcome the trials and tribulations thrown at you, but your still smiling brightly and head held high like no one can ever withdrawn you, not even any superhero's, I was in awe at you. For many bad things that we both overcome and all those atrocious times, we had learned every single life lesson that is what life has to offer to us and shared it with each other.

You're too nice mom, even grandma and dad always reminds you that too. You let other people hurt you and make pass at you, you let them stomp you off, but I realise you wouldn't be who you are right now if it wasn't for all those people with their shallow reasons to hate on you. One or two things that I learned from you 'never out down to their levels' and I truly understand what you meant by that, I remember that one time where all my so called friends turn their backs on me? and said nasty and incredulous things on the internet and even in person to me, you were there backing me up and comforting me when all I do is cry thats when I realise I don't need those backstabbing people I still have you and I hope you do know that when everyone turn their backs on you even the whole world I'll always accept and be there for you. 

You're a good example for a woman who was working hard for a living (I know every mom does but you're just that different) and I've seen you working everyday and night, and sometimes you rant about how some people can be so selfish and mean and how stress you are at work, you know what mom? I can't thank them enough because of their shallow and ridiculous reasons to make your life miserable you gained knowledge and wisdom from them and some are now handed to me. Don't let them criticise you, the people who tried to make you miserable are just those low class people. I know I haven't been the best daughter, with my mood swings and frankness and I always smart talk to you, and I'm sorry for behalf of it but I make mistakes too and you understand that too well enough to give me a pep-talk. But even through my imperfection you still love me unconditionally and I can't explain how much I love you, thank you for sharing all this good things with me and jersey, all the things I wrote above this is just half of things I am thankful for because clearly If i listed all of it I would waste a day to spend my time doing nothing at all so instead bare with all of this.

We've shared a plenty of good memories with each other, obviously it was one of the best time aI've ever spend my days with anyone, you always told me that,"I'm boring to be with" but no, maybe sometimes yeah but I love hanging out with you more than my friends. 

Thank you mom for being you, thank you for understanding my unpredictable mood swings, thank you for teaching me some good lessons in life, just thank you for being there, I hope you know that you mean the world to me and even though you grow old and grey I will still be here for you, someday I might not be the same little girl anymore I will be the person who will take care of you and make your dreams come true, I will make you proud because right now, I've always been so proud of you. I love you so much and this pass few days have been so hard for you and I understand it, don't worry we all make mistakes mom, I don't expect you to be perfect I just want you to be open minded to all the decisions I've made and will made in the future, I want you to understand me and thats what I'm doing to all your decisions in life too. I will always be here for you through tears and laughter :) 

Happy Mother's Day Mommy! Have a nice day I love you! xx

And to all lovely mothers out there 'happy mother's day' stay awesome xx

-Jackie

Caption

Coachella 

I have experience a lot of trust issues with so many people that I am close/closed too, and maybe its because I trust too many people that in the end of the day I'm always the one who got hurt instead of putting the pain away I forgive them so easily, I don't hold grudges, I'm not really that kind person I learn from the best and I know hating or holding some grudges over someone is not the best, not at all. It wasn't easy and I'm not use to not be with many people as possible, I don't care if they're bad or good if they're a good friend then they're my friend, but as I said I change my way this year I won't be that easy to be close to, but I will always be a good friend to everyone, no exception. But I want to surround myself with positive and easy people who I know I can really rely on when I needed someone, who I can share all my bad habits and secrets without feeling uncomfortable. 

-Jackie

 

Birthday Wish

the beatles poster 

the smith movie poster 

arctics monkeys poster

I've been dreading and wanting to have this posters since i don't know when, what I know is that I love all this bands and I wanted to have a poster that reminds me of how much this bands means to me, but unlucky me kicked in and I lost all the places to search for this posters *sigh*

Since I get too addicted AGAIN to PLL I wanted to read the books, like all the series and I think this book series will look good in my new bookshelves :)

YES, I need this shirts like seriously its like life and death situation, I'm in love with all this band shirts as much as I love the band(s) I've been wanting to buy a Ramones shirt lately but never got the chance to do so.

Vinyl is like my new addiction, I would love you if you buy me one *wink* *wink*

Yes please, I have ask all the branches if they still have this CD but you know 'THEY ARE ALL OUT OF STOCK" can i kick their butt please (kidding)

Michael Kors bitches (sorry mom) yes I wanted to have one, they are gorgeous 

I'm obsessed in beanies, I know its summer like duh but I'm in love with them, they're too comfy and very warm (yes I said warm) 

Canon EOS 60D

and the last, Canon EOS 60D with 67mm lens hood canon, just look at that baby <3

9 days until my birthday comes and I'm still unsure on what to do on that special occasion, I've been thinking about this lately,  I'm turning 15 this year and I have been so lucky to have this people in my life specially my parents and friends who guided me through my journey. I will post a birthday blog after the eventful day hope you guys have a good may :) 

Escape

my oh oh tee dee 

I don't know what to post anymore, I don't open my laptop that much since this april and apparently I bought a PLL (pretty little liars) dvd box set which I am super addicted now, I was hoping to get the inspiration I've been wanting to see and understand but lately I'm starting feel sad and I feel vulnerable myself. I don't like that, I don't like those feelings I get like I wanted to disappear and be gone like zeroed out from this world, I don't like that feeling where you don't know who to trust anymore, I don't like that feeling where you think everyone secretly hates you, I hate that feeling where you feel like you need to care what other people thinks of you, I don't like that feeling where you can't even write one word on what you feel. Its like the universe itself can't explain what you are feeling that it actually gives up on you like you do to yourself.

I hated saying this or more like writing this stuffs about how I feel, but writing is the only thing that gives me hope and relived feelings from all of this. But thats not the point of this post its just half of it.

Education shouldn't be about teaching us formulas or process that we'll never think about when we leave school, it should never be about solving problems in a complicated fractions, how about give us a lesson about how to have a strong healthy self image, teach us how to deal with mortgages and bills. How to find a value in everyone and everything, teach us how it's okay to be different from each other, teach us how to find ourselves, teach us that choosing your sex is not a crime, teach us how to not judge other people by their appearance, teach us how to chase our dreams, instead of drilling the idea into our minds that our grades determine our future. Education shouldn't be like going to a break hell where every morning you need to wake up and worry about the same thing everyday, people who dislikes you, teachers who make you do hard stuff that doesn't even make sense anymore, teachers who  force you to speak up in front of your class instead of doing it themselves, paying up some bills just for a school dance, making you suffer from all this homework, School doesn't make sense anymore, I get the fact that you're there to learn or for what people say to make friends and have a social life but you can have both without going to school.

Teach the next generation to love the world they're living in instead of teaching them the things that people now are teaching us, teach them how it's okay if they don't like the same thing as everyone, that it's okay to be who you are instead of pretending to be someone else, so they can fix the mistake that we inherited to you.

I was always the kind of girl who go to school and pretend to love it, I'm tired of going to school and learn the same thing everyday, solving problems and equation, learning story's and such as. I want to travel around the world and see new perspective everyday, talk to people and learn that way. I wanted to do things in my own way, make mistake and redo it. I want to learn as I go gathering knowledge and not rigorously tested on it. I want to learn things as I find myself along the journey, I don't want to lose passion in the things i love because of the worry of exams. If only I have all the money I need to get out of this place and start finding a whole new world, I would, I would go and get away from this old place where I've been practically hurt, I would go and forget all those people who don't believe in me, I can get away from the people who hurt me, I can have my own place in New York or Paris, meet new people, find a job and just escape from school and other old habits that I have. School was never my best friend but i met some good people, but that's not the point, I want to travel and learn from here and there, I don't need school to learn things in a hard way. When I was writing, i know that a lot of you would react or think "you're lucky you can go to school while someone out there doesn't have the money to go to school" well SORRY that I see things in a right and good way. Life isn't about going to school and associate with teachers and friends, its about learning but does school made you any good? yeah you have friends there, but the lesson you gather from it was not the helpful and genius topics that you can take with you as you struggle to live. Because while it's important for us to learn the facts and figures, I'm pretty certain that if you'd taught us all of the above, the world be such a lovelier place. Like it always should be.

-Jackie